Damn It, Sora!
by Slashluv21
Summary: What more can you get from Sora than his utter repulsiveness? Come along to the Darkness and we'll even give you a free Keyblade to back up the complete madness.
1. What Sora Wants for Christmas

Axel: Tight jeans, double D's, making me go-

Roxas: SHUT THE FUCK UP AXEL AND STOP SINGING ABOUT ME! It's not Christmassy. And by the way my bra size isn't a D...it's a B.

Sora: Is mustard Christmassy Roxas? YES? YES? No?

Roxas: *sigh* Alright Sora, what do ya want for Christmas?

Sora: Yeah...I want a furking blowjob, betch.

Roxas: You want candy you say?

Sora: Blowjob!

Roxas: *slurs* Candeh?

Sora: Blowjob!

Roxas: Candeehh?

Sora: BLOWJOB.

Roxas: Candeh?

Sora: BLOWJOB!

Roxas: Alright a blowjob! Jeesh...*looks for Riku*

* * *

Kairi: What's on Sora's list?

Namine: A rainbow pony.

Kairi: Alright then. OK, what about Riku?

Namine: Uhhh...a golf cart.

Kairi: Axel?

Namine: Fire.

Kairi: Demyx?

Namine: A knife.

Kairi: Why a knife? Doesn't he want a new sitar?

Namine: Uh, obviously not cause in parenthesis he put (no I don't want a new sitar, I prefer a knife to kill Axel-er, I mean, lettuce. To cut lettuce. Ah yes, lettuce is geeewwwdd).

Kairi: Oh well. Yeah, lettuce is good. I'm proud of him.

Namine: Me too.

Kairi: So Manse-er, I mean, Xemnas?

Namine: Uhhh...a chainsaw.

Kairi: He wants a fresh Christmas tree. OR...he wants to run down the neighborhood chasing people like "I'm like a chainsaw. WHHAAATT?"

Namine: The hell. I don't know. I can't understand his fucking handwriting.

Kairi: Um...it says: SKHJIRJURNVMJ.

Namine: Yeah I know. It means 'bullshit' in German.

Kairi: oook. Isn't that Saix's handwriting?

Namine: Saix must've written it for him while getting his butt raped.

Kairi: That's so true!

* * *

Roxas: Alright Sora, it's either the fuckign candy, or blowjob! CHOOSE WISELY YOUNG GRASSHOPPAH!

Sora: Um...candeh!

Roxas: Fine! A blowjob it is!

Sora: NUUU!-ok.

Roxas: You want the candeh then?

Sora: No. Blowjob.

Roxas: Ok, candeh it is.

Sora: FUCK YOU!

Roxas: FUCK YOU TOO!

Axel: Ooh...three way?

Roxas: Shut up!

Sora: *cries* I wanted the blowjob!

* * *

Sora: Hey viewers! I got a messssssssage for you guys!

You better not pout

You better not cry

I'm telling you why

Santa Claus-

Riku: IS A FAKE!

Sora: Shut up you nonbeliever! I shun you!

Riku: Be naughty kids. :D

**Check out my YouTube account, SoraXMe4ever! **


	2. What is Sora?

Kairi: I need to go see my boob doctor!

Riku: Who in the hell is your boob doctor?

Kairi: Sora, of course. He feels me up and gives me minutely check-ups.

Riku: You know, I could've gone my whole life without knowing that.

Axel: EEEWWW! IMMA PUKE!

Roxas: But your flat-chested!

Kairi: Shut up! You're just jealous cuz your not as sexy as I am!

Sora: I'm not a doctor anymore I'm a laywer now.

No wait, I'm not a lawyer, I'm a ninja now!

Kairi: Oh my god, a ninja, that's so sexehhh...

Riku: Sora, you can't even fight me so how can you be a ninja?

Sora: I'm not a ninja I'm a chicken catcher now!

*random chicken squak somewhere*

Roxas: A chicken catcher? You couldn't even catch a snail if you wanted to.

Sora: ...

I'm not a chicken catcher I'm a hobo now.

Riku: WTF ARE YOU SORA?

Sora: Sora gonna be comin over there and be all up in your grill if you don't stop cussin!

Roxas: Gay...

Sora: Oh yeah I'm not a hobo I'm a homo now.

Riku: Yes...

Sora: I'm not a hobo I'm an astronaut now!

Roxas: I am walking away at thsi moment! *walks away*

Sora: I'm not an astronaut IMA PIMP, NOW!

Kairi: Ooo, can you be my suga daddeh?

**Short but bored. :)**


	3. Shorts Number 1: Katsup

Sora: Roxas? Where's my katsup?

You stole my katsup!

How dare you steal from your own brother!

Roxas: Damn it Sora! I didn't take your damn katsup!

Sora: Oh really Roxas? I had two! Now there's only one!

Roxas: Get out of here! Are you fucking smoking crack?

Sora: ...

Why should you know?

Roxas: Oh wow.

Sora: Oh, Roxas. You stole my tuna too! I HAD TUNA AND I WANT MY TUNA!

Roxas: If you don't believe me, go check my kitchen.

*Checks*

Sora: ROXAS!

YOU HID THEM!

YOU HID THEM IN THE DAMN WASHER MACHINE!

Roxas: Jesus Christ...


	4. The Cheesecake Talk

Sora: I like cheesecake.

Kairi: Shut up Sora no one cares what you like.

Sora: *cries*

Roxas: OMG! I LIKE CHEESECAKE TOO SORA!

Sora: *smiles goofily* CHEESE!

Namine: YAY WE'RE ALL HAPPY!

Organization XII(Org 13): Whoot! Yeah! Ya!

Kool Aid Man: Oh yeah! *crashes through wall*

Everyone: O_O

Kool Aid Man: *slowly backs out of room*

Pahsex(Xemnas): Waa I'm sad.

Namine: What's wrong with him, he found out how you can flip his name?

Pahsex: I WANT PAH.

Sora: There's no more but have some of my cheesecake.

Kairi: *gasp* Sora how dare you!

Sora: What?

Namine: DIE EVIL KOOL AID MAN!

*gunshots*

Kairi: You give your enemy cheesecake but not your own wife?

Fine. I see how it is.

Demyx: NUU! YOU KILLED THE KOOL AID MAN!

Namine: Shut up Demyx, he was evil!

Roxas: Ooo Sora you just screwed up!

Sora: Baby come back! You can blame it all on me!

Roxas: You watch too much Swiffer commercials.

Riku: Yo wut up my homehs?

Namine: EW! RIKU GO AWAY!

*gunshots*

Sora: NUU! MY FIRST LOVE!

Kairi: Damn it, Sora! I was gonna give you another chance, but you blew it!

Roxas: Real smooth, Sora.

Pahsex: PAH!

Roxas: FUCK YOU XEMNAS!

Kairi: Ooo, you said a bad word Roxxy.

Org 13: OOO! OMG!

Sora: Ooo look vodka!

Riku: Where?

Namine: STAY DOWN MOFO!

*gunshots*

Org 13: USA! USA! USA!

Axel: Roxy-poo!

Roxas: GAH! NU! STAY AWAY FROM ME! *runs away*

Sora: Bitches love me cuz they know that I can rock!

Namine: DIE!

*gunshots*

_Meanwhile..._

Saix: Oh no I'm going to be late!

Xigbar: For what?

Saix: I forgot.

Everyone: ...

*lights turn off*

Sora: Why is it so dark in here?

Kairi: BEWARE! DON'T SINK INTO DARKNESS!

Roxas: Too late!

Sora: Hold on, I think I found a light switch.

Kairi: LIGHT IS NOT THAT EASY TO FIND! YOU MUST LOOK DEEP IN YOUR HEART!

Riku: NO WAIT THAT'S THE SELF-DESTRUCT-

*explosion*

THE END

Riku: No just kidding. It's not the end.

Roxas: Though have a lot of "end" at the End of the World!

Sora: Haha! We fooled you guys!

Roxas: Seriously, someone turn on an effin light.

KAIRI: HEARTS ARE-

Riku: SHUT UP NO ONE ASKED YOU!

Org 13: Its so dark!

Gah monsters!

AAHH!

Blah blah blah!

Everyone: ? O_O

Leon: Hey there.

Everyone: YA LIGHT! WE HAVE LIGHT!

*gunshots*

Leon: Shut up.

**(teehee, bet you thought it was Namine) **

Leon: Anyways, ever wondered how old Axel is?

Axel: What the hell, man?

Roxas: YOU'RE OOOLD!

Axel: No I'm not, I'm beautiful. *fluffs hair*

Demyx: FUCK ME SIDEWAYS!

Sora: Now...right at this moment. At this fucking second, it's the-

Org 13: Hurry up! Get on with it! Booo!

Ah blah blah blah!

Sora: Ok, ok, at this moment...now it's the end!

THE END

Org 13: DUH DUH DUH DUUUUHHH!


	5. Kingdom Hearts Goes to High School

Selphie: YA HIGH SCHOOL!

Kairi: Why do I have to go to the same school with that dumb Sora?

Selphie: I thought you liked him.

Kairi: YOU CRAZY? He's annoying and gay. He loves Riku.

Pahsex: BEHOLD AND WELCOME TO MY HIGH SCHOOL OF DOOM!

*thunder*

Sora: Riku! I'm scared!

Riku: GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME SORA!

_

* * *

__In Math Class..._

Axel: OK Sora what is 2+2?

Sora: 1%

Axel: Nuu. Now let's try 5x5.

Sora: 10!

Axel: No, its 25.

Now, let's try 11 sixes. What does that equal?

Sora: 25!

Axel: How did you get into high school?

Sora: Is that supposed to be a trick question? Cuz I can answer that! THIS time its 25! Yes? Yes? No?

Axel: *rolls up in ball*

Roxas: How did you become a teacher? YOU MOLESTER!

Axel: *gasp* How did you know?

Roxas: Cuz you're always trying to rape me!

Axel: No NO ROXAS!...you rape yourself.

Roxas: How do I rape myself?

Axel: Don't question the teacher!

Namine: Shut up fools!

Axel: STOP BEING SUCH A SMARTASS!

Namine: Stop yelling!

Kairi: Please don't leave me! Blah blah blah...

Sora: Kairi, stop with the pink subs!

Pink: Aww...

*leaves*

Kairi: OK!

_I'm blue! _

_If I'm green I would die! _

Axel: Everyone? Get back to work!

Sora: Suck it BITCH!

Org 13: Ooo, that's badass!

Oh snap, badass!

Kairi: Axel is geting owned by his own students.

* * *

Pahsex: SHUT UP OR YOU ALL GET "F" AND HAVE TO GO TO MY OTHER SCHOOL OF DOOM!

Namine: And that is?

Pahsex: Watching Fred all day on YouTube!

Org 13: Ooo even more badass!

Totally.

* * *

_In the Halls..._

Kairi: Hey Sora I thought maybe we could get back together.

Sora: Kairi...you only want me for my big cock.

Axel: WHAT DID YOU SAY?

Sora: I mean...*clears throat* ahem, MY PET PEACOCK!

Okay...this is the part where Kool Aid Man burst through the walls and Namine shoots him!

Namine: Not feelin it.

Riku: No, wait Sora. This is a letter from the Kool Aid Man!

Sora: *reads* I'm sorry, but I have to quit. Because apparently no one likes me.

And I always get shot.

*stops reading*

Ah, he'll be back!

Org 13: Yay! Whoot! He finally left!

Demyx: Hey HEY!

Org 13: We mean...aww, he left.

Ah BLAH BLAH BLAH!

Namine: DIE STINKING OGRE!

Org 13: THAT'S ORG 13 TO YOU!

BLAH BLOOP!

* * *

_In Choir..._

Demyx: Hello and I am your choir teacher with my rocking sitar.

Sora: OH GOD! FUCK ME!

Demyx: Ok Axel starting off with you. Let's see if you remember the lyrics!

Axel: Um...ok.

Demyx: Ok! Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men...

Axel: HAD SCRAMBLED EGGS! yum.

Roxas: God I never knew it, bu he's that stupid.

Sora: I WANT SOME!

* * *

Saix: Principal!

Pahsex: AH! You scared me!

Saix: Riku is head dunking Sora in the toilet bowl again!

Pahsex: Damn it! What am I going to do with those boys?

Saix: You know...we could always spank them.

Pahsex: o_O

ORg 13: Errr...

No comment for that.

Yeah, no comment for that.

Sorry, we got nothing.

* * *

_Lunch Time..._

Demyx: Oh I found pah.

Org 13: HALLELUJAH!

Xemnas: What in the world that never was are you doing?

It's mine!

Sora and Roxas: MY PAH!

Namine: NUU! MINE!

*gunshots*

Sora: Somewhere over the rainbow!

Way up high!

Namine: Sora you sing bad.

*gunshots*

* * *

_At the Football Field..._

Leon: I AM YOUR FOOTBALL COACH! And always remember there is no "i" in "team"!

Sora: Yes! There is "i" in "teaming"!

Roxas: There's also "i" in "in your face, you dickhead".

Leon: YOU BOYS GOING TO FIGHT? GIVE ME 100 NOW!

Sora: You think I have cash?

Roxas: No you fucking dumbass he means push-ups.

Sora: ...

I don't have those either.

But Victoria Secret does! See, I just spent my 100 dollars on these! *lifts shirt*

Everyone: O_O

* * *

Riku: I'm only asking this once. How did you get into high school?

Sora: Wait...this is high school?

Kairi: HOLY BALLS OF FIRE!

Org 13: CANADA! CANADA! CANADA!

Sora: Nuu! Canada sucks!

Org 13: NEW YORK! NEW YORK! NEW YORK!

Kairi: That's not a country.

Riku: FUCK IT!

Demyx: What's love, got to do? Got to do with it? What's love?

THE END

Pahsex: I quit this job.


	6. Shorts 2: Two Camels in a Tiny Car

Roxas: *drunk* Sora, you gotta, you gotta,

whoa.

You gotta try this shiza!

Sora: Nu thank you...I'll pass.

Roxas: But it makes you feel so good!

Sora: I know how to say nuu!

_5 Minutes Later..._

Sora: And then, and then

I found the hall of fame!

In the center of the moon!

And there were...a bunch of...a bunch of...

These...beautiful...donuts.

Roxas: Wow. Dude, that's a sign!

Sora: Of what? SIGN OF WHAT?

Roxas: You're gifted. YOU HOLD THE POWER OF DONUTS!

Sora: *high laugh*


	7. Robot Poncho and Sex Ed

Sora: Bonjour ya'll!

Beep!

Kairi: Stop thinking you're a robot, Sora!

Sora: Beep beep beep!

Kairi: SORA!

Sora: BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!

Kairi: Ok Sora. I'm gonna remidn you that you're a human the only way a woman can.

Roxas: You gonna do his laundry?

Root Sora: *SELF DESTRUCT*

Everyone: O_O

Kairi: FUCK YOU TOO!

* * *

Sora: *hugs Kairi*

**Me: WAIT! PAUSE IT! **

**Sora: What? **

**Me: How can you hug that slut? That's just wrapped in a pink towel?**

**Sora: It's over with. I'm not with Kairi anymore. **

**Me: Still, it pisses me off! **

**Org 13: BOOO Continue the damn story already and stop the drama! **

**Riku: I can't believe its not butter!**

** Marluxia: BALLS! **

**Demyx: It hurts when I pee. **

* * *

Namine: Don't worry Roxas we'll go visit Axel again!

Roxas: Really?

Namine: Yeah, once a month we'll go visit him!

Sora: OOHH. We're like his period!

* * *

Sora: Hey guys! Meet my pet elephant!

Demyx: You got a pet elephant?

Sora: Yea!

**Sorry, but describing Demyx eating an elephant was too graphic to be categorized in the M Rating, so I cut it out. **

Demyx: Nom nom nom.

Sora: NUU! YOU ATE MY PET ELEPHANT!

I loved him. I called him Poncho. He gave me rides to school!

He was such a good elephant.

Though, he pooped a lot.

* * *

Roxas: Sora stop poking me with your Keyblade! It's going through my skin!

Sora: I KNOW I KNOW! I MEANT TO THAT TIME!

* * *

Larxene: *clears throat* Girls don't have sex. It's very bad and unhealthy and boys suck-

Sora: COW NIPPLES!

Kairi: Sora, you're in the wrong sex ed class for the umpteenth time!

Sora: I KNOW! I'm just here for the pictures they flash of the insides of your boobies...

* * *

Namine: I MADE OUT WITH A TREE!

* * *

Demyx: THE PAH! IT GOT BURNED!

Axel: Oops. My fault.

* * *

Sora: PSH! Your outfit is too emo!

Roxas: Your outfit is too...colorful!

Sora: Oh yea? PSH...PSH...PSH..

Roxas: PSHA!

Org 13: OOOHHH! Pwned.

Major badass.

Sora: PSH! You smell funny!

Roxas: You look funny!

Axel: You people are duuummbb...

Roxas: Well you suck!

Axel: Suck whaaat?

Roxas: Cow nipples!

Sora: No! Banana flavored-lollipops of course!

* * *

Sora: WE HASH ALIENS IN OUR CLOSETS!

* * *

Org 13: DARTH VADOR IS GONNA KILL US ALL!

* * *

Demyx: Hey everybody let's go ride on a cloud!

Cloud: OFFENSIVE!

Roxas: Cloud?

Sora: A cloud?

Roxas: Jinx! You owe me a soda!

Sora: NUUU!

Wait. I mean-

COW NIPPLES!

* * *

Sora: Kairi, did you know?

Having sex 3 times a week burns the same calories as running about 30 miles per week!

Kairi! You're my new exercise equipment!

Sora: *gets bitch slapped*

What's so wrong with referring your lover to a treadmill?

Kairi: SORA! YOU'RE REALLY PUSHING IT!

Org 13: Haha

Teehee

Mwa ha ha

BEST SEX EVER!

What happened to blah blah blah?

WAIT FOR IT!...

Blah blah blah!

Sora: Maybe running from her is good exercise too!

Kairi: SORA!

Sora: AUGH!

Kairi: HOW DARE YOU TAKE THE LAST PAH!

Sora: Wait. You're not mad about the treadmill thing?

Kairi: Nuuu. Think about it, Sora.

Putting your balls on a treadmill...

Sora: OW! OW! OW! I GET IT NOW! OWWW!

* * *

Axel: EAT THE ICE CREAM!

Roxas: FUCK YOU!

Sora: WHY ARE WE YELLING?

Ooh, ice cream!

Axel: NUUU!

* * *

Namine: O-M-G it's Roxas! He's so effin hot!

Roxas: Huh?

Namine: THE PAH. THE PAH IS SO EFFIN HOT!

* * *

Sora: I think I've gone deaf!

Kairi: Ok?

Sora: What?

Kairi: I didn't say anything.

Sora: WHAT!

Kairi: I DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING!

Namine: She didn't say anything.

Org 13: Ooo, she didn't say naything!

Cold shoulder.

Ouch.

Blah Blah Blah Man: Zzz...

* * *

_About 4 or 7 seconds later..._

Sora: I got my hearing back!

Namine: Does that make you feel special?

Kairi: Does that make you feel powerful?

Sora: O_O

Namine:

5

4

3

2

Sora: WAIT! WHY ARE WE COUNTING?

Everyone: ...

Namine:

1!

BOOOM!

Org 13: What a rip off.

Namine: Wait for it...

Robot Sora: BEEP!

*self destructs*


	8. What Sora is Thankful For Not Really

Roxas: So Sora, what are you thankful for?

Sora: Well, let's see.

My hair.

My teeth.

My good looks.

My eyes!

My sexiness-

Roxas: Sora, not just about you! About what you have or your family and friends!

Sora: Ok!

Umm...

Umm...

Ummmm...

Errr...

I don't know.

Roxas: Jackass.

* * *

_Back at the World That Never Was..._

Saix: Sir, I'm done painting the castle brown.

Pahsex: Excellent work, Saix! Now help me out here! What do you think we should have, turkey or ham?

Saix: I think we should go with the tradition, sir, and eat one of the Organization members.

Pahsex: Was it in the Llama Book of Rules?

Saix: Yes sir, I looked it up.

Pahsex: Well then, GET ME LIGHT SABORS! We're having Demyx for dinner!

Saix: Right away, sir.

Pahsex: I never did like the Kool Aid Man.

Saix: Neither did I, sir.

Pahsex: And Saix, stop calling me sir, you're making me nervous.

* * *

_Back at Twilight Town..._

Sora: ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! I finally figured out what I'm thankful for.

Roxas: Well it took you two hours. What is it?

Sora: Mah Keyblade.

Roxas: That's still about you.

Sora: Nuh uh, Roxas, it's about the key, Roxas, THA KEEEY!

Roxas: I'm outta here.

Sora: I lurve you Keyblade.


	9. Shorts 3:If Sora and Roxas Were Brothers

Sora: *sigh*

Roxas: *sigh*

Sora: Roxas, stop!

Roxas: Roxas, stop!

Sora: Seriously, cut it out!

Roxas: Seriously, cut it out.

Sora: Dad!

Roxas: Dad!

Cloud: What?

Sora: It's Roxas!

Roxas: It's Roxas.

Sora: I'll kill him!

Roxas: I'll kill him!

Sora: Mom!

Roxas: Mom!

Cloud: Sora's saying everything Roxas says a second before he says it.

Aerith: Damn it Sora, that's so immature.

Sora: You're DEAD!

Roxas: You're DEAD!

**(imagine Sora vs. Roxas like in the game) :)**


	10. This is Fucked Up

**Me: Yo its me again! **

**Org 13: Boo! YOU SUCK! **

**Whore! **

**REINDEER GOES BLAH BLAH BLAH! **

**Kairi: Yeah, fuckin leave already. **

**Me: Suck it bitch! **

* * *

Kairi: There was this huge spider in the closet!

Namine: *gasp* NO WAY!

Sora: Wassup girls?

Kairi: It was PURPLE!

Sora: Demyx, she was yelling colors at me again!

Kairi: I meant the spider DUMB DUMB!

* * *

Riku: Hey Sora, shave your 5 o'clock!

Sora: Nuu! I think it makes me look mature!

Roxas: Uh-huh, sure Sora.

Sora: SHUT UP YOU DUMB BLONDE! YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT!

Namine: *gasp* Sora, you're a jerk.

Sora: I know.

Kairi: OH MY GOD THERE'S THE BIG PURPLE SPIDER AGAIN!

Org 13: AUGH RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!

MY BLAHTITUDE IS RUINED!

Sora: Eww! A spider! *runs miles away*

Everyone: o_O

* * *

Namine: Aww...it's kidna cute.

Org 13: Augh, Namine's a spider-sexual!

Namine: A SPIDER WHAAAT?

Roxas: How nasty dawg!

Namine: You sound so white when you say that Roxas.

Roxas: Nah dawg, you feel me?

Org 13: Cricket...cricket...cricket...

FROG!

Everyone: O_O

* * *

Sora: That's fucked up!

Namine: *breaths hard* WHAT IS? !

Sora: Your face!

Roxas: Nah, THAT'S fucked up, yo!

**Me: Suck me fat one! **

Org 13: Oh sweet Jesus...

* * *

Namine: *gasp* YOU'RE A BOY?

Wait. I think its what boys have.

I wouldn't know. I don't get any.

Roxas: Ouch, wanna put some lotion on that burn?

Kairi: I thought you and Roxas were together!

Roxas: EWW DAWG!

**Me: NO MY BIG TOE! **

Sora: THIS IS FUCKED UP!


	11. The 'Sora' Opera

Pahsex: Behold, I have become...

FAT!

Sora: Do you see the title? It's the Sora Opera. Not the Pahsex Opera. This is MY DRAMA SHOW!

Anyway, this is a story, about my first love.

Riku: I thought I was your first love!

Sora: Nuu you're my second love.

Riku: You said I was your first love in high school!

Sora: Nuu. You. Are. My. Scond. Love!

Riku: Nuu, Kairi's your second love. Wait, I'm your third?

Sora: RIKU!

Kool Aid Man: OH YEAH! *bursts through walls*

Sora: Namine!

Namine: I'm on it!

*gunshots*

Sora: So she loved me and I loved her. And we were so happy together. Until then-

**Me: Wait, you skipped a line! **

Sora: I read the script idiot, not you!

**Me: Yeah, but I wrote the script! **

Sora: Wait, there's no script! This is a story of my life!

**Me: Yeah, but you still skipped a line. **

Sora: YOU KNOW WHAT?

*gunshots continue nonstop*

~ ~ BEEEEPPP! ~ ~

Sora: Anyways, onto my story. It just didn't work out. Cuz in the end, I ate her. But to thid say, she's still my favorite...DONUT!

Roxas: Damn it Sora, you got problems.

Org 13: So romatic...

Aww, so cute.

Such a romantic story.

I WANTED A DONUT!

Roxas: Sometimes I wonder why I ever joined that group.

* * *

Roxas: Ahem.

Now here's my story why I left the Organization.

Ok, first they ran out of dounts and cheeseballs!

*Flashback*

Saix: Are you sure you will be honest to our group?

Roxas: Of course, now where's the snack table?

Saix: *points*

Roxas: WHAT? ! YOU RAN OUT OF DONUTS AND CHEESEBALLS? ! I'M OUT OF HERE!

**Me: Why is it so hard to remember your lines? **

Roxas: Why is it so hard for you to shut up? !

Org 13: Ooh!

Fourth degree burn!

**Me: No commentary please! **

* * *

Riku: Mmhm.

Roxas: Trying to rape me.

Marluxia: BALLZ!

Pahsex: What is the meaning of all this? We are having a very important meeting.

Kairi: What meeting?

You mean the one where you drink tea?

And wear pink feather boas?

And talk about rainbows and unicorns?

Demyx: *whispers* She's on to us!

Pahsex: Distract!

Axel: Nuu! The one where we sit on big ass chairs and talk about how great pah is!

Org 13: Mmhm.

Pah is good.

Oh yeah, pah is very good.

Sora: Can I join?

Everyone: NUU!

Kairi: Then you have to join the Darkside Sora.

Org 13: YESH!

Sora: Awwh!

Pahsex: Join the Darkside Sora. We have pah.

Demyx: I thought we had fresh cookies!

* * *

_Later That Day..._

Sora: I need to check my YouTube.

*checks*

OMG! Someone only rated me 2 stars on my video!

BLOCK EM!

Org 13: Oh no it's a witch!

BURN EM!

Roxas: Your ass is gonna get blocked.

Everyone: PWNED!

* * *

_At the Part Where Somebody Dies in Every Fuckin Opera..._

Xion: Oh Romeo. We can't be together anymore.

Roxas: What? Nuu! Why?

Xion: Cuz I'm dying, dumbass.

Org 13: *silence*

Marluxia: BALLZ!

* * *

Axel: Ello bitches of Earth!

Sora: Hey! This is my story! GET OUT!

*gunshots*

Kool Aid Man: OH YEAH! *bursts through new part of wall*

Sora: MOTHER FUCKIN DOODLE. Namine!

Namine: Fuck it! I don't shoot for you anymore.

Now I shoot for Roxas.

Roxas: EEWW! GIRLS!

* * *

Marluxia: BOW CHICKA WOW WOW!

Roxas: Now Sora, this is the part where we end our show.

Sora: NUU! I haven't gotten my chance of fame!

Roxas: Who cares, just say bye.

Org 13: CANADA! CANADA! CANADA!

Sora: Mwah! Love you all!

Kairi: What about my story?

Namine: You all dead! I SAY YOU ALL DEAD!

**Me: Skipped a-**

Namine: MAH STORY!

*gunshots*

Robot Sora: *self destruct*

FIN

Sora: Hey Riku. Let's get it on.

Riku: Ooo, ok Sora.

Axel: *giggles*

Sora: Damn it Axel! TURN OFF THE CAMERA!

FIN

*again*

Kairi: Ok. Here's my story.

Namine: ITS THE END DAMMIT!

*gunshots*

FIN

*for the last fuckin time*


	12. Shorts 4: Sora Sees A Therapist

Leon: Ok, Sora. Let's start with this picture.

*holds up pic of teddy bear*

Can you tell me what you think it is?

Sora: A taco!

Leon: No, but let's try this one.

*holds up pic of ice cream*

Sora: A tacoooo!

Leon: Um...that's not what it is. Let's try one more time.

*holds up pic of butterfly*

But please don't say its a taco!

Sora: A taco! BUT! With cheese.

Leon: No. It's a butterfly!

An effin BUTTERFLY!

CAN'T YOU SEE IT'S A BUTTERFLY!

Aerith: Here. Let me try.

*holds up pic of taco*

Sora: ...

What the hell is that?

Leon: SON OF A...BITCH!

Sora: Whoa whoa now...have YOU ever thought about seeing a therapist?

Leon: *sigh*

You need serious help kid.


	13. A Random Convo With KH Friends!

Sora: I'm a rock star baybeh! A mother fuckin rock star behbeh!

Kairi: What the hell, Sora?

Sora: What?

Kairi: Let's just go get some donuts.

Roxas: CHEESEBALLS TOO!

Namine: *draws in sketch book* Lala.

Yaoi!

Kairi: CATWOMAN!

Sora: Wait...what are we all doing?

Roxas: Getting donuts and cheeseballs and yelling at superheroes!

Namine: We need to get pancakes too!

* * *

Axel: ELLO BITCHES!

Demyx: Whoa...deja vu.

Axel: I came to pick up my Roxy-poo!

Demyx: Whaa? You dragged me all the way over here to pick up Roxas? !

Namine: ROXAS! YOU TRAITOR!

Roxas: I'm scared of you with your gun.

Axel: I can't get donuts without Roxy-poo.

* * *

_Meanwhile..._

Kairi: Yay! Sora you're so cute!

Selphie: What happened to annoying and gay?

Roxas: Ew! Your guy's love is nasty, dawg!

Namine: Gay. Gay and white. A world record! *calls up Guinness Book of World Records*

Sora: I know cuz I like Riku.

Riku: Yesh...

Org 13: OMG!

NO WAY!

SO DISTURBING!

Blah Blah Blah Man: :3

* * *

Axel: Ew Sora, you like boys?

Everyone: o_O

Axel: Oh...wait...nevermind.

Namine: *draws in sketch book* Lala.

Sora and Roxas are so cute together!

Org 13: HOLY CRAP!

NO WAY!

THAT IS SO NOT THE SHIT!

Blah Blah Blah Man: EW! BOYXBOY IS DISTURBING!

* * *

*a couple seconds later*

Sora: I KNEW IT! THEY DID HAVE A PEPPER BAR!

THE END

Roxas: Kiss my ass, bitches!

Namine: DAMN IT! KNOW WHEN ITS THE END!

*gunshots*

**Me: *sigh***

THE END


	14. Sora Likes Your Hair!: A Songfic

**Made by me! Enjoy! **

**Sora Likes Your Hair! **

**A songfic. xD **

*claps 4 times slowly *

Sora:

_Hey there_

_I like your hair_

_Who does your hair?_

_I wanna go there _

_PSHA! _

_Everyone: ? _

_I like your hair! _

_Who does your hair? _

_I wanna go there! _

_Hey bitches! _

_Nice scalp bitches! _

_I do my own damn hair! _

_PSHA! _

_I need more gel! _

_My hair looks like hell! _

_Oh hey bitches! _

_OH MY GOD! _

_Blond hair. - imagines Namine_

_Brunnete(brunnete) - imagines Ollete_

_Redhead? - imagines Kairi_

_More like dreadhead! _

_OH MY GOD! _


	15. AN IMPORTANT MESSAGE! CLICK NOW!

Thanks for reading. :)


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